I am still here, didn't move....at all

I still have the thing in my hand that I should not bring from 2011 to 2012. I feel myself so useless. These things should be very easy to be done but I just too scare to know the results. So the problem keeps dragging and still being undone until this moment.

My determination to do something I need to do is really weak. I may easily being affected by my evil mind, then I give up on something I shouldn't give up.

I think my life now is totally a mess. I can't even forgive myself, especially how easy i have already gave up myself for so many times. I do nothing but just being so helpless to see the problem grow bigger and bigger. fml.

Could you please give me some courages? Anyone?

:(